Why I Need a 21st Century Mullet

[csberry]

For those with the inclination, if you wanna see the only way that I looked good with long hair, find yourself a copy of Grissom High's 1991 yearbook. My senior picture shows me with the mullet that I had grown until 1/2 way thru the year.

A year after that picture was taken, I was working on growing ALL of my hair out. I was in college and had no need for the "business" front of a mullet...oh, and I had also realized that I had a mullet for the past couple of years and mullets were not stylish. This lead to a hairdo that was pretty close to being worse than the previous mullet.

My hair is VERY thick. It's like play-doh, it's that thick. When I grew my hair out it really grew - out. After a while, I was able to get it shoulder length...which also meant that it was shoulder width. I was "mushroom/penis head" thanks to my multicolored, big hair. This experiment of growing all hair out was worse than my hockey hair transgression in high school.

The years since then have seen me sporting the typical IBM executive cut (with a brief phase after a make-over in the late 90's into a Caesar cut like Clooney had at the time). I'm getting the itch for a change but the interesting qualities of my hair keep nixing possibilities that I see.

One hairdo that I'm willing to do again...is the mullet. The bushy nature of my hair worked with allowing the back to grow out. I look like my forehead vomited hair when my bangs get long, so I must keep them short. Part of me misses my neck getting hot, grabbing my hair up in a ponytail, and feeling the cool rush of air hitting the back of my neck. Now, there's no chance of me actually doing this because I'm not looking to make any great statement about the mullet's role in modern society. I'm just saying that if the mullet makes a comeback or a new variation of it comes along, I'll be there.

Comments

[csberry.livejournal.com]

The dickhead do did nothing for the chicks. During the time that I was growing my hair out, I was hit on by a lot of men (calling Dr. Freud on the dickhead/gay men). For the first 2 1/2 years in college when I was growing it out, I had about 36 men and 5 women ask me out on dates or casual sex (I think those were the raw numbers, I know that it was 7:1 give or take one or two). After the cut, it went 50/50 with the women increasing in interest. As that I was fishin' for women, the shorter do did well.