(no subject)

[csberry]

I found this faxed joke recently (ah, the heady days when spam came on curled up sheets of shiny fax paper) and wanted to give it an "upgrade" to this electronic format.


Trojan Condom Co., Inc.
6969 Slippery Root Drive
Droptrouser, ILL 30234

Dear Mr. ___________

We regret to inform you that we have rejected your application to model and represent our product, Trojan condom.

Although your general physical appearance is not displeasing, our Board of Directors feels that your wearing of our product in the advertisement does not portray a positive, romantic image. A loose, baggy, and wrinkled condom is NOT considered appealing.

We did, however, admire your efforts to try and firm it up by using POLY-GRIP, but, even then, it slipped off before we could get the photographs taken. We would like to note, however, that yours is the first we have seen that looked like a bicycle grip.

We appreciate your interest and thank you for your time. We will retain your application for future consideration, if, by chance, we decide there is a market for micro-mini condoms.

We send greetings to your wife and our deepest sympathy.


Very truly yours,


Burley Dick, President
Trojan Condom Co., Inc.






BD/ssm

P.S. - Remember our slogans:
Cover your stump before you bump
Don't be silly, protect your willie
Never deck her with an unwrapped pecker
Before you attack her, wrap your whacker
If you're not going to sack it, go home and whack it

Comments

[chris21718.livejournal.com]

Thank you so much for posting this cheerful thing on an otherwise dreary Monday! :-)